Ask Lee: How to Deal with Name Calling

Published on August 20, 2018May 1, 2024 by Lee2 Comments

I’ve been getting a lot of requests in my inbox to write an Ask Lee about name-calling, so today I’m here to talk about how to deal with this all-too-common issue. Let’s face it, we’ve all probably run into this issue at one point or another. And, unfortunately, we’ve probably all been guilty of name-calling, too. And we all know that it can result in feelings getting hurt and strained friendships and business relationships. My best advice on this topic? Avoid calling other people names. If you don’t fall into the cycle yourself, you will look like a class act and avoid any unnecessary drama. But for those of you who have been the victim of name-calling, here’s my first-hand advice for how to deal…

Confront it head-on.

Not all name-calling situations need to be confronted, but if your feelings are seriously hurt it might be worth it to stand up and say something. You always, always have the right to defend yourself in any situation where you feel you’ve been wronged. Name-calling is no different. But however you deal with confronting it, do not reciprocate in the name calling yourself. Whether it’s a friend, a family member, or someone you’re in a professional relationship with, you should confront that person and talk to them directly, if it’s truly bothering you. Remember to stay calm and don’t act when you’re feeling angry or emotional—that’s when you might say something you will regret.

Take the high road.

There have always been name callers and there always will be. That is not in your control. What is in your control is how you react. Win by being nicer. Don’t stoop down to their level. Don’t come back with an equally hurtful attack (as much as that seems like a great way to blow off steam at the time). Chances are if someone calls you a name, they’re calling other people names too. Set an example that name-calling is not ok by taking the high road and demonstrating that you will not reciprocate that kind of behavior yourself. As my mother always said: just walk away.

Don’t sweat it too much.

Whether you’ve confronted the situation or taken the high road and let it go, try not to let it get you down. Who cares what that person thinks of you? If they’re judgmental enough to say something negative about you, they might not be someone you want to be associated with anyway. Often times when people call you names, it’s more about what they’re going through than how they actually feel about you. Try to step in their shoes and think about what they’ve been going through that would lead them to say something hurtful about you. Personally, when I’ve been called names in the past, I would do something to hurt that person even more but now I simply try to laugh it off. It’s hard to remember this when you’re in the middle of a tough situation, but keep in mind that laughing it off will make you happier in the long run.

Have you ever been called a name? How did you deal with it? Do you have any tips to add to my list above?

Let me know in the comments below. And be sure to stay tuned for my next Ask Lee post coming next month.

XO Lee

P.S. If you liked this post, you might also like…
Ask Lee: My A’s to your Q’s.

A Day At The Fort Lauderdale Beach

Published on July 30, 2018July 30, 2018 by Lee1 Comment

Hello Beauties, June 29, I had decided last minute to head to the beach and it turned out to be an experience that I cherish close to my heart. That day, my head became a little clearer and my smile became bigger. My smile was real too. Here are couple of reasons why I cherished that moment so much.

I have anxiety which means I have become antisocial over the years. Being around bunch of people, especially people I don’t know can be stressful for me. I’m always in my head and thinking about the worst. But that day, I survived.
I was at peace by MYSELF. I was there from 11:30 am to 4 or 5 -ish pm.
I enjoyed the scene and everything with little money I had. I was happy, like truly happy and learned a lot about myself while getting a nice workout in the process.

Making time for yourself and learning how to enjoy your own space is so important. Never in a million years did I think that I would go to the beach by myself and stay there for longer than 15 minutes. I’m happy I did though and can’t wait to go back. I might even just travel to Orlando or Miami just because. You might be thinking girl, it’s just the beach but for me, its more than that. I proved a lot to myself and didn’t let my anxiety or anything else get in my way. I want to do bigger trips but for now, traveling around Florida will do. If you want to know how I did it with basically no money, What I did, and Where I went then keep on reading…

How Did You Get There?

I took the bus, simple. I got the whole day bus pass which is $5 and took Bus Route 40. I asked a nice man who was hitting on me but it didn’t bother me because he wasn’t disrespectful. He told me what bus to take and gave me directions to get to that bus stop.

Now, if you want to get there quicker without having to wait and make several stops along the way then I suggest you take Lyft. It is going to be pricey depending on where you coming from but you can use my code: CRYSTAL40317 to save $$.

What Places Did You Hangout At?

First, I walked along the beach then I stumbled upon CVS. It wasn’t that far, it was located in Beach Place plaza. I purchased a bottle of coke, I was really thirsty. Mouth felt dry and everything. Thinking back at it, I should had got a water bottle instead especially since when the coke wasn’t cold anymore, it tasted weird. It was warm, not like room temperature, just warm.

Then I went to the beach and dip my toes into the nice cool water. The sun was out but it wasn’t too hot. I wished I had my bathed suit or extra clothing because if I did, I would had became a mermaid for sure lol.

After I finished playing in the water some more, I went up to a family who was tryna take pictures and asked if they needed help. They were so nice, they were traveling from Switzerland. I took some bomb pics for them and said goodbye. Next, I walked some more and saw many parties that was happening at different resorts. I was invited by this lesbian who was cool as fuck. I sat by the pool with them and talked. The music was booming and boobies were out. I spent like 1hr with them before I left. Everyone was just happy and living their best life.

I continued to walk and saw many beautiful resorts, restaurants, hotels, homes, and boats. I decided to turn back around because I was getting hungry and I was a little scared that I might be going too far; I didn’t want to get lost. Since, I wasn’t wearing my glasses, me getting stuck wasn’t the plan and I do sometimes forget things. I just didn’t want to take any chances. Plus, I didn’t have cash on me, so if it had reached 11:59 pm, I would had been screwed because that’s when my bus pass would had expired.

I headed back to Beach Place to rest up. There were many tourists. It wasn’t packed but it was still busy. My back felt better, my body felt better so I got up and continued to see what the prices were looking like for the food. One restaurant had a sale going like buy a burger and get a coke for free and another restaurant Lona had different promotional flyers up. That place was busy, well from what I saw at least. People were eating, drinking and just chilling. Honestly, I wanted a hot dog but the place wasn’t open and there were no other place that was selling hot dogs.

I rode back taking the Bus Route 40 then jumped on Bus Route 22 to get back home. I ended my day with a sweet tea from Dunkin Donuts and 6 pieces of hush browns. They have sweet tea, any size for a $1. I am kinda sad that I missed the Live Music & Entertainment at Fort Lauderdale beach but next time.

Share some of your favorite beach day tips!

Have you traveled to Florida? And if you have, what was your experience like?

When was the last time you explored the town you live in or a neighboring town? That could be a fun journey and an escape from the everyday grind, couldn’t it?

XO Lee

Published on December 3, 2017June 24, 2018 by LeeLeave a comment

8 Tips on how to be beautiful without makeup

Many of us can’t even imagine our life without makeup. Today’s topic might sound strange and even scary for many girls, thanks to media popularization of unrealistic beauty standards. To be beautiful without makeup?! Is it even possible?!

It became our daily ritual to wake up early and put on our “beautiful” makeup mask.
For many of us it would be a big nonsense even to go to a supermarket with no makeup on. Media often forces us to believe that a woman with no makeup on can’t actually look somewhat attractive or beautiful.

In this article, I don’t suggest that you completely let go and forget about taking care of yourself; on the contrary, if you want to live a makeup-free life, or at least be able to have makeup-free days, then it makes sense to put a little bit more effort into caring about the natural beauty of your face, hair and body.

1) Feel beautiful (even without makeup)
Yes, first step to natural, makeup-free beauty is connected with your inner perception of yourself – your self-image. How do you feel about yourself inside? It all depends on you. Try to feel beautiful. Yes. Right now, in this very moment… Know that you are pretty!

If a girl considers herself beautiful and is able to accept herself totally and unconditionally, then the whole world will feel the same about her. Yes, it’s that simple!

But if you don’t feel comfortable and confident about yourself with no makeup on, try to adapt the new ‘natural’ image gradually. For example, while on vacation, give your face a “vacation” as well, by using a minimal amount of cosmetics; use only mascara and a touch of lip gloss.

2) Your skin is your everything!
If you decide to live a makeup-free life, it doesn’t mean that you need to completely let go of all skin care products. Nobody abolished daily cleansing and moisturizer; these are necessary ingredients to the beauty and health of our skin.

If you used to deal with pimples by covering them up with tones of makeup – now, your main concern is the health and beauty of your skin.

Many skin problems are actually related to the excessive use of makeup; skin tone becomes uneven because of the reaction of your body on a foundation, concealer or blush. If you stop using foundation (at least for a while), after some time, you’ll notice that your skin tone will improve and there will be no need of that thick makeup mask any more. If skin problems persist, get a professional advice from a dermatologist; it’s better to treat the problem straight away, than to put it on hold into a waiting box.

Some other tips for the beauty of your skin include: use facial masks 2 or 3 times a week (choose masks according to your skin type), and exfoliate your skin regularly (we are not only talking about exfoliating your facial skin, but also exfoliate your whole body.)
Here is one of my favorite skin care tips: splash your face with cold water in the morning and in the evening for about 10 seconds. This helps to tone your skin naturally and will also help close pores.

3) Your beautiful natural eyebrows
Usually, when we apply makeup, we often try to change the proportions of our face and adapt it to world’s beauty standards, so that sometimes, we even forget how pretty and unique we look naturally.
If you want to minimize your daily makeup routine, then try to emphasize your natural features. Let’s start with your beautiful eyebrows. Look in the mirror and notice natural shape of your eyebrows, if you over-plucked them, then try to grow them back (apply natural oils on your eyebrows every evening; use castor oil, olive oil, coconut oil or burdock root oil) and then, shape your brows once and for all with the help of a professional, or with the help of YouTube. 🙂 If your eyebrows are too light and you usually draw them with a pencil, try a semi-permanent brow coloration in a salon instead. This will look more natural, so that your makeup-free face with well defined and beautiful eyebrows will instantly look more attractive.
Here is another tip on how to make your natural eyebrows grow: apply Jamaican Black Castor Oil (will help your eyelash and eyebrows to grow thicker and longer, and keep from breaking. It also helps promote new growth in bare areas caused by over-tweezing.) or Almond Oil on the brows every evening before going to sleep; do it for one or two months and see wonderful results! ( However, the growth period might vary based on the health and age of each individual.) Messaging your eyebrows with warm olive oil for 5 minutes before bed can also help. Just make sure you rinse it off with warm water the next morning. Try to avoid any temptation to pluck and exfoliate the eyebrow area daily to help stimulate hair growth.

4) Be transparent
When we are talking about beauty without makeup, it doesn’t mean that we should completely ignore all the beauty industry and forget about all cosmetic products. There are some great products on the market that can help you emphasize your natural beauty, such as eyebrow gels and transparent mascaras for your eyelashes, chap sticks, lip balms and lip glosses with no or a little bit of color; these nourish your lips and make you look fresh, natural and beautiful. Here is another beauty tip: I use The Queen Pegasus to help grow my eyelashes full and thicker. I also brush my eyelashes every day and every night to prevent clumps. Did you know that Vaseline helps grow eyelashes longer, thicker, and stronger It also claims that moisturizing around the eyelid will help the skin stay smooth and supple. The best way to get results from this is to use a cleaned mascara wand to apply the Vaseline to your eyelashes before bed.

5) Healthy eating and water
Good food is important not only for the beauty of our skin, but also for the overall health of our body. We are what we eat, therefore healthy and balanced diet should be our faithful, lifelong friend.
Make sure you eat fresh fruits and vegetables every day, as well as healthy fats and proteins; these are so important for our beauty. And, of course, our best friend is water! Try to drink about 8 glasses of water a day and also treat yourself with a green or white tea from time to time, because these are rich in antioxidants and will help your skin look fresh and young for a very long time, even without makeup.

Shhh… Come here I’m not the healthiest eater but when I make rice, I put vegetables into the rice and it will be mixed in so there is no way around it. Also, I love to fill up my Brita Pitcher with water then add slices of lemon to it. Lemon promotes hydration, it’s a good source of vitamin c, it improves your skin quality, it supports weight loss, it aids digestion, it freshens breath and it helps prevent kidney stones. I sometimes like to suck on limes. The health benefits of lime include weight loss, improved digestion, reduced respiratory and urinary disorders, relief from constipation, and treatment of scurvy, piles, peptic ulcer, gout, and gums. It also aids in skin care and eye care.

6) Kissable Lips
Here is a very simple tip on how to make your lips kissable and soft: gently massage your lips every evening (or every other evening) with your toothbrush for a couple of minutes (or use a ‘sugar+honey’ scrub instead); then rinse and apply Shea butter/pure coconut oil(your natural moisturizer) on your lips. Now, feel how tender, soft and kissable your lips feel; your prince charming won’t be able to stop kissing you!

SHOP:

7) Smile and love yourself
Smile will instantly help you to feel and look pretty, even if you don’t have any makeup on!

As Audrey Hepburn once said: “Happy girls are the prettiest!” Smile every time you look in the mirror, smile to people you see on the street and, in general, let smile be your favorite accessory – you will see how the whole world will start smiling back at you!

Love yourself. Accept yourself fully and completely. Love the way you look with or without makeup, because you are truly unique and beautiful! Remember it!

8) What about your hair?

If you want to look pretty with no makeup on – it’s important to take good care of your hair and keep your hair color close to natural.

If you use certain “extreme” hair colors, such as blue, pink or green, it can emphasise all little “imperfections” on your face and draw attention to them.

Try to keep your hair in great condition by using right hair care products that are suitable for your hair type, and do hair masks and oil treatments regularly. Nothing can be more beautiful than silky and shiny locks!

Hair Tip: Try Curls – Organic Hair Products

Do you think it’s possible to be pretty without makeup? Feel free to share your thought and beauty tips in the comment section below ⬇️

Stay beautiful 💞

JULIA ROSE

Published on May 11, 2017March 1, 2018 by Lee14 Comments

juliarose3

INTERVIEWED BY CRYSTAL LEE

1. What inspired you to become a model?

” I love being able to work with different photographers to make art come to life. Modeling allows me to travel and to see new place and meet new people while working.

2. What have you learned during this journey?

” I have learned that some days are going to be better than others. Some days you wake up feeling confident and beautiful and other days you don’t feel like getting out of bed. But pushing through it and learning to love yourself through the process is important.

3. What do you define as beauty?

” I define beauty as being confident and loving every inch of yourself. I know it sounds cheesy and I know it’s way harder than it sounds but learning to love yourself, even your scars…that’s beautiful.

4. How do you deal with your own insecurities and what advice can you give other women who have them?

” I embrace them. Most people try to hide their insecurities but I feel like our insecurities are what makes us stand out and be individuals. A model can feel insecure about something that ends up booking her a job. For me, it is my jaw. I have always had a HUGE jaw…and was made fun all through out high school, I mean kids would sing the JAWS theme song when I would walk down the hallway, but as I get older I have learner to embrace it and it ends up being the highlight of some of my photos.

5. What are some of the worst decisions you’d have made, how have they affected you and what did you learn from them?

” Some of my worst decisions were not being honest in certain circumstances and being scared of what people would think. I learned that you can’t make everyone happy but it’s always better to disappoint people with the truth rather than entertain them with a lie.

6. What advice can you give to young women who are interested in following your footsteps?

” I would give them the advice to not follow my footsteps but create their own. Every model has to take a different path to their goals and dreams. But always, always believe in yourself and use people telling you that you can’t do it as fuel to prove them wrong and to do it.

7. What made you decide to do Are You The One? Would you ever do “reality” TV again?

” I decided to do AYTO because it was an opportunity to spend a month in a Hawaii and its an opportunity that not a lot of people get to have. I thought it was going to be ALOT different from it was. At this point, I am not sure “reality” TV is my thing. You have to have a lot of drama in order to keep people entertained, and right now I am really focused on my career and I am trying to separate myself from all the drama.

8. Where do you see yourself in the next 10 years? 20 years? What goals do you want to accomplish?

” In ten years I see myself being a published model. I hope to have my first book published within the next couple of years along with appearing in Sports Illustrated. 20 year…oh goodness I would be 43! Probably settled down with a couple of little Julias running around. Overall I want to accomplish happiness, and knowing that I put in a lot of hard work through out my life; while helping a lot of people in the process.

9. Do you have any beauty routines and if so, what are they?

” I have had trouble with my skin in the past so I live by drinking a big glass of warm lemon water right when I wake up and drinking as much water as possible through out the day. Also rubbing coconut oil on my face before going to sleep.

10. Do you have any upcoming events or plans we should watch out for?

” I will be in New York May 19th for my Sports Illustrated casting call so I have a feeling there will be much more to come after that.

11. What keeps you motivated?

” Honestly, my boyfriend Stephen. There are so many days I don’t want to eat healthy or go to the gym but he is always there pushing me to work harder and telling me I can do it.

12. What are some fitness tips you can give to our girls?

” DRINK LOTS OF WATER. I know people say it all the time, but it makes such a different. Also, mix up work out routines and keep things interesting. Even getting up and hiking, or 15 minutes of cardio is better than nothing.

13. What do you think is the most significant barrier to female leadership?

” I think the most significant barrier is each other. There are so many girls that are mean to other girls when they know how hard it is to be a girl. We should just realize that we are a team and that we should be uplifting each other, not trying to be better than one another. More compliments, less criticism.

14. Growing up did you play any sports? If so, can you name them?

” I played softball pretty much from the time I could walk all the way through college.

15. How would you describe yourself in one word?

” Strong. I have been through a lot and I am always working on picking myself up and learning to be better.

16. What are your hobbies? What do you do in your non-work time?

” I love to camp! It has recently become one of my favorite things to do, along with going to the flea market.

17. Does your family and friends support your dream?

” Most of them. I grew up in the south so my family is pretty conservative (especially my grandma) but they are just looking out for me.

18. Are you dating anyone?

” I am…Stephen from my season of AYTO.

19. Name 2 of your guilty pleasures:

” CHOCOLATE and sleeping in.

20. How have being on Are You The One changed your life?

” It has definitely made my private life more public, but it has opened many doors for me and allowed me to meet so many different people.

21. Is there any woman who inspires you? Why?

” Lana Del Rey, she just embraces being unique and embraces being a woman. I love her outlook on life and struggles.

22. Who would you love to collaborate with if you had the opportunity?

” The same as answer 21 lol. I would love to collaborate with Lana Del Rey, she is a woman who has had her own set of struggles with society but is so strong and mysterious at the same time.

23. What is your favorite candy?

” anything covered in chocolate.

24. You have a gorgeous skin. What is your skincare routine?

” I know I have said it many times, but drinking plenty of water and moisturizing with coconut oil at night really does the trick.

25. What was the biggest change you had to make in life?

” Moving from Texas to LA by myself without knowing anyone was very hard, but it was one of the best decisions of my life.

26. You seem like a genuine person with an amazing soul, how can we be friends? Lol

” We can be friends if you have a cute puppy.

27. Name 3 fashion trends that you think shouldn’t come back?

” Overalls, those platform flip-flops that were like six inches tall, and wearing jeans under dresses.

28. What is your favorite beauty product?

” COCONUT OIL for sure.

29. What book has inspired you the most? (OR What is your favorite book?)

” Anything by Ellen Hopkins. She has such a unique writing technique and writes about real life issues rather than some facade love story.

30. Are you friends with anyone from your season or that was on Are You The One?

” I mean obviously Stephen is pretty much my best friend but other than that, I talk to some of the others every once in a while… like Kay or Asaf. I even talk to Cam sometimes.

31. Since being on the show, who have you worked with?

” I have worked with so many different brands like Go Jane, HoneyPunch, Femmebot, Arsenic, and so many more.

32. What is your favorite beauty page/blog?

” Honestly, I don’t really have one. I am much more into fitness blogs like bagsandbunnies.

33. You get compared to Minka Kelly a lot, are you over it now? And, have you met her yet?

” No, if anything it is a major compliment…I have not met her yet but who knows what the future holds.

34. I like your tattoos, how many do you have? And, was there a meaning/story behind them?

” I have three. “Just Breathe” on my ribcage reminding me that when life gets tough to just breathe and remember its going to be okay. An arrow on my side to remind my that life is like an arrow.. you have to be pulled back in order to be shot forward. and an anchor on my ankle because I was eighteen and my friends all paid for it.

Tell us 4 facts about you.

– I am from the south and can make the best buttermilk pie ever.

– I can throw a football better than most guys can

– I will never love anything as much as my dog.

– I can lick my nose

↣Instagram: @its_juliarose