Tag: self love

SINGLE and HAPPY

Published on by LeeLeave a comment

If you’ve just ended a long relationship or you’ve been looking for Mr. Perfect for far too long, there’s no better place to be right now.

Reminder: you have to stop wondering what to do with your life or how to spend your free time. Being alone doesn’t mean being lonely, and it gives you endless possibilities for discovering new dimensions of life and improving yourself.

There’s a time to be dating, and there’s a time to be alone. That doesn’t have to mean loneliness. Being single is all about being free and being happy. Let’s find out why.

Editor’s note: Although this article uses male pronouns, the advice applies to all sexual orientations and gender identities.

1. More me time

All this time that you used to dedicate to the thoughts of one particular man is now freed up and all yours. You can start new hobbies, focus on reading more, focus on your career goals, meet up with people that you haven’t seen recently, or just lie in bed and watch your favorite TV shows and relax all day, every day. Sounds like a great deal.

2. All decisions are in your hands

All couples can admit that, as a whole, they make most of their big decisions together. It’s not always nice having to agree on something just because your partner said so. You know the feeling … neglecting your needs and desires to satisfy your loved one is definitely not the best part of being in a relationship. So enjoy your freedom and make decisions on your own—no one is going to mumble about it.

3. No compromises

Relationships are built on compromises, and sometimes, there comes a time where you want to be free and not have to compromise with anyone. When you’re single, there’s no compromising about your love life, the way you spend your time, your hobbies, the people you see, where your finances go, and so on. You’re free to experience what you want.

4. Now’s the time … fill your passport

We all know traveling alone is an incredible experience, not to mention that, if you have a s/o, they’re not always going to want to come to all the places you want to go to. Problem solved. The best part of being single is that you can buy a ticket and go to any place in the world—and the only permission you need is your own.

For those of you recovering from a breakup, remember, you came to this world alone. At one point in your life, you never knew this person. So you can live without them and you will. And guess what? You will do just fine. Find your power, reach for life, and have fun again.
Dwelling on the past does not make space for the future. Sitting back and telling yourself “They really weren’t that bad” is the mind playing nasty tricks on you. If that happens, quickly call a friend and ask them to remind you of all the times you complained about your ex. That will help you squash that lie quickly.

I encourage you to find the courage to move on. A breakup creates space for something new. Let the newness of you in. Let whoever came to your life for a “reason” and “season” go. They have done their job. Now do your job and move on with the next exciting chapter of your life. Let the sunshine in.

Mirror Talk

Published on by Lee1 Comment

by SIANA LOVE  9 months ago in SLAM POETRY

Looking into the mirror what do I see?

I see a beautiful smart woman looking at me

I see pain behind her hazel eyes

I see sadness behind her smile

But I also see a glimpse of hope between her teeth as if it’s inside her looking for a way to come out

I see a girl that wasn’t loved enough

I see a girl who was loved so much that she can’t even see it

That’s why she wears glasses,

To help her focus on what’s really important in life

I glance down and I see her body

A temple created from the one she calls Father

But God forbid someone told her she was beautiful

She’d smile and politely say thank you but deep down that word would be the meaning of doubt in her ears

When she hears she is beautiful she stands confused

As if they need the glasses to see what she is seeing

She wonders if they call her pretty in a way of making fun of the fat girl with a nice face

Or a way of proving to her that they don’t fat shame

Did you know that she hates silence? The girl in the mirror

She can’t stand being in a room full of people and no one talking

She knows they can hear her breathing, gasping for air

Sometimes they would ask “why are you breathing so hard?” as if she does it on purpose

She can’t control it, but it happens

So she tries to make conversation, hopefully, this will distract them into a conversation and not focus on her breathing because that’s all shes focused on in a silent room

Did you know that she drowns in the silence?

Thoughts come over her like a wave storm and now she’s thinking about why her dad couldn’t be there for her like every other dad is, she wonders why she isn’t loved?

She turns to all this approval from men because she never got anything from her dad

She hides her shames, her tears, her pain… Behind that “nice” face

Those beautiful hazel eyes, they have cried themselves to sleep so many times

That smile… Is a reminder that she must be strong, for her, even if no one sees

She’s at war with herself, trying to be more outgoing but the extra skin on her body weighs her down so she stays hidden, waiting that hopefully someone will find her and give her the one thing she needs most…. Love