You have the right to say no (or yes) to others without feeling guilty.
There are many reasons why we say yes when we want to say no. We might be worried about rejection or what others will think of us. If we are conflict avoidant, it might feel easier to “go along to get along,” but in the long run, denying your truth is a one-way ticket to bitter town.
You have the right to make mistakes, to course correct, or change your mind.
Many of us feel once we make a decision, whether it’s in a relationship, our careers, or something as simple as saying yes to walking our neighbor’s dog on our lunch break, we’ve got to stick with it forever. You have the right to change your mind. Every choice doesn’t have to be a life sentence.
You have the right to negotiate for your preferences, desires, and needs.
You are the only one who knows what your unique preferences, desires, and needs are, and you are the only one who can negotiate for them. When we don’t share what we want and need, the people in our lives don’t know who we are. Many of us were taught to be “easy-going” and not to be “difficult.” The truth is, sharing a preference isn’t difficult. It allows people to truly know us.
You have the right to express and honor all of your feelings if you so choose.
Being fully expressed is part of being a Boundary Boss, but it also means you get to choose what you share, when you share, and with whom. You are not obligated to share or confess all of your feelings to everyone. You have the right to be discerning.
You have the right to voice your opinion, even if others disagree.
If you’re a peacekeeper or a people-pleaser, it can be difficult for you to share your opinion if others disagree. Again, discernment comes in here. Just because you have the right to, that doesn’t mean you have to share all of your opinions with someone aggressive or abusive. You have the right to talk true when it’s right for you.
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You have the right to be treated with respect, consideration, and care.
The way others treat you all starts with your relationship with yourself. You set the bar! When you hold yourself in high regard and prioritize yourself, others will follow your lead. If you’re overworking, over-functioning, and overgiving, chances are you will attract people who will expect you to keep doing that. Begin treating yourself with the respect, consideration, and care you deserve, and set that bar HIGH, baby.
You have the right to determine who has the privilege of being in your life.
Imagine your life as a VIP section, and you are the only person on the guest list. You get to decide who gets the privilege of your company, your time, and your energy. If you don’t learn how to be the bouncer in your VIP section, you might find yourself endlessly twisting yourself into a pretzel and inconveniencing yourself for anyone who wanders past the velvet rope and plops themself down. Not everyone deserves a 24-hour backstage pass to your amazing life. YOU get to make a choice.
You have the right to communicate your boundaries, limits, and deal-breakers.
Again, only you know what’s right for you concerning these things. What is and what isn’t ok with you? What are your non-negotiables? Getting clear about your limits and needs is the first step to asserting yourself and healthily communicating your boundaries. And it is doable.
You have the right to prioritize your self-care without feeling selfish.
There are many myths and limiting beliefs around self-care. Many of us have been taught we should prioritize everyone else and put ourselves last. But when our self-care isn’t solid, we can end up feeling depleted, exhausted, angry, and resentful. The reality is, taking impeccable care of ourselves is the foundation for success in our relationships, our careers, and our entire lives. When we prioritize our self-care, we are at our best and give from a place of love and abundance rather than one of lack.
You have the right to talk true, be seen, and live free.
What I teach inside Boundary Boss is a process for lasting transformation. When you learn this life-changing skill set, speaking up with ease and grace, asserting your truth, and expressing your feelings and preferences become your new normal.
This is a safe space, so let’s admit it: we’ve all kind of wanted to read someone else’s diary before. You know, to get rumors cleared, tea spilled, or just to try to understand them a little bit better. Aside from people in my personal life (don’t act like you haven’t thought about it, too), a few celeb’s diaries are what I’d love to get my hands on. Not in a weird way, like to sell its contents to TMZ or pass any kind of judgment, but simply to get to know a more realistic version of these people that we talk about non-stop but know so little about. Well, lucky for us, celebrity memoirs do just that.
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Whether it’s adeep dive into their personal life and upbringing, obstacles they’ve faced, juicy tell-alls of Hollywood drama, or anything in between, celebrity memoirs are packed to the brim with content that’ll keep you sucked in just as much as a good mystery or true crime read. It feels like every celeb and their mom has written one at this point, so we’ve gathered some top-tier picks to help narrow down the search. With summer finally, here, you won’t be short of any 10/10 beach reads to enjoy this season. Here are 20 celebrity memoirs you need to add to your reading list ASAP:
As he navigated criticism and abuse from some of the most powerful people in Hollywood, a painful past, and a society dead set on forcing him into a binary, Elliot Page often stayed silent, unsure of what to do. Until enough was enough. The Oscar-nominated star who captivated the world with his performance in Juno finally shares his story in a groundbreaking memoir about love, family, fame, and stepping into who we truly are with strength and joy.
Paris Hilton is the most recognizable influencer in the world, but getting to this point was anything but easy. This powerful memoir follows her story of growing up in the spotlight and the struggles she faced behind closed doors, detailing the evolution of celebrity culture and emphasizing that everything is almost never as it seems. But most importantly, she shows us her path to peace while she challenges us to question the world’s role in her story and in our very own.
Before losing his mother, Prince Harry was known as the carefree one, the happy-go-lucky Spare to the more serious Heir. However, grief changed everything. He struggled at school, experienced anger and loneliness, and because he blamed the press for his mother’s death, he struggled to accept life in the spotlight. He went on to find discipline and peace in his life, but he still struggled to find love—until he met Meghan. The world was swept away by the couple’s cinematic romance, but from the beginning, Harry and Meghan were preyed upon by the press, subjected to waves of abuse, racism, and lies. Watching his wife suffer, their safety and mental health were at risk, so Harry saw no other way to prevent the tragedy of history repeating itself but to flee the Royal Family. For the first time, Prince Harry tells his own story, chronicling his journey with raw, unflinching honesty and diving into a life of love over grief and power.
From television actress, Broadway star, and New York Times bestselling author, Kristin Chenoweth, comes an inspiring memoir featuring philosophical-ish musings on connection, creativity, loss, love, faith, and closure. Just like Kristin’s grandmother inspired her to trust her heart and develop her own belief system, this memoir will inspire you to develop your own life philosophies, as you journey through some of Kristin’s most vulnerable and humorous personal stories.
From the magical moments on set as Draco Malfoy to the challenges of growing up in the spotlight, we get a backstage pass into Tom Felton’s life on and off the big screen. His adolescence was anything but ordinary. His early rise to fame in beloved films like The Borrowers catapulted him into the limelight, but nothing could prepare him for what was to come after he landed the iconic role of Draco Malfoy, the bleached blonde villain of the Harry Potter movies. For the next 10 years, he was at the center of a huge pop culture phenomenon and yet, in between filming, he would go back to being a normal teenager trying to fit into a normal school. Tom shares his experience growing up as part of the wizarding world while also trying to navigate the real world in this entertaining, funny, and poignant must-read for any Harry Potter fan.
Julia Fox is famous for many things: her captivating acting, such as her breakout role in the film Uncut Gems, her trendsetting style (including bleached eyebrows, exaggerated eyeshadow, and cutout dresses), and her mastery of social media, where she entertains and educates her millions of followers. But, all these share the trait for which she is most famous: being unapologetically herself. This commitment to authenticity has never been more on display than in this beautifully written memoir in which she dives into her upbringing, inspirations, lessons learned, and the unique transition from girlhood to womanhood while being a spectacle of the public eye.
Now if that’s not a title that grabs your attention, I literally don’t know what will. Jennette McCurdy, most famous for her beloved role as Sam on “iCarly,” talks about her struggles as a former child actor—touching on addiction, eating disorders, and of course her very complicated relationship with her mother. This memoir will have you crying on one page and cracking up on the next as it indulges you in the beautifully written story of how McCurdy found herself and retook control over her life.
Imagine if your mom wrote a book compiled of letters addressed to you in which she reveals her most wild life stories and all the valuable lessons she’s learned from them. That’d be unreal, right? Well, that’s exactly what Asian-American comedian Ali Wong does in her hilarious and heartfelt book written for her two baby girls. They’ll probably have to wait until they’re 18 to indulge, but it’ll definitely be worth the wait.
If you fell in love with Jonathon watching his lovable, larger than life personality on “Queer Eye,” you absolutely must snag a copy of “Over the Top.” This memoir uncovers the pain and passion it took for them to end up becoming the model of self-love and acceptance (and slay-ness) we’ve come to know and love. Jonathan shares never-before-told secrets and reveals sides of himself fans have never seen in this genuine, raw, and 10/10 read.
Actress, screenwriter, and comedian Mindy Kaling invites readers on a tour of her life and her hot takes on romance, friendship, and being a woman in Hollywood in this memoir that makes you feel as if you’re just chatting over coffee with your BFF. From reminiscing on her squeaky-clean childhood to thoughts on body image, topics of all kinds are talked about through the charismatic tone and girl next door vibe we all know and love.
One of the most well-known female comedians of all time, Tina Fey, gives us an equally funny and intriguing run down of her life from beginning to now in this humorous memoir. Starting from her childhood as a nerdy, smart-mouthed girl all the way to how she found such great success in show business, we get to hear from Tina Fey in a way we’ve never been able to before.
Emmy, Grammy, and Tony award winner Billy Porter (SO close to EGOT status—you got this, Billy) recounts what it was like to grow up Black and gay in America, and his resilient determination to overcome the barriers set before him and discover his talents and voice. A multitalented, multifaceted icon gives us one of the most highly praised celebrity memoirs to date with his powerful voice and important messages.
In this incredibly written and revealing memoir, Oscar-winning actress Viola Davis shares an intimate look at her childhood and how she grew into the woman she is today, including what it was like growing up in poverty with an abusive father and healing along the way to becoming the Viola Davis we know now.
While Drew Barrymore’s first memoir recounts her younger days of fame and darker life moments, “Wildflower” meets an older, more confident Barrymore reflecting on her larger-than-life existence, from being emancipated from her parents and paving her own distinct path. It’s a story of how she successfully rescued herself and created a legacy of her own—a tear-jerker, for sure.
“Star Wars” fanatics, this one is for you. Entertainment industry icon Carrie Fisher tells an intimate, hilarious, and revealing recollection of what really happened behind the scenes of one of the most famous film sets of all time, the very first “Star Wars” movie.
“The Office” is one of the most beloved sitcoms of all time, and stars of the show Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey put aside their on-screen rivalry to become real life besties and create this sweet recollection of memories and never before heard details of the making of this cult-favorite series. Imagine getting to write a book with your BFF about all of your most memorable times together—the dream, really.
We all know that comedian and actress Tiffany Haddish is undeniably hilarious, but in this memoir, we learn that she had to be funny at an early age out of necessity, as it helped her get by in school and the foster care system. She writes so genuinely about how she came from nothing to become one of the most successful comedians in Hollywood, and how her old survivor tactic led her to her dream career.
Iconic comedian and newly renowned pottery artist Seth Rogen is basically the cool dad of Hollywood, and this incredibly funny take on a memoir shows just that. He shares a collection of personal essays and hilarious anecdotes about doing stand-up comedy as a teen, attending Jewish summer camp, moving to LA, and some of his favorite high stories, obviously.
Wildly talented actress Constance Wu, best known for her roles in “Crazy Rich Asians” and “Fresh Off the Boat,” delivers a powerful and poignant new book about family, romance, sex, shame, trauma, and how she found her voice on the stage as an Asian American woman.
In this unexpectedly brilliant memoir, model, actress, and activist Emily Ratajkowski talks about her own experiences navigating complicated and sometimes sexually abusive environments as a hypersexualized woman working in entertainment with crucial messages about feminism, power, and gender woven throughout.
When summertime rolls around, working from home can either feel like the biggest blessing or a total drag. The advantages of it—like zero commute or the ability to wear what you want without getting any disapproving looks from coworkers—can be especially teasing when the warm weather hits. It’s easy to become irritable when you’d rather be at a rooftop bar or lounging on the beach, or if your skin’s sticking to your desk chair and you just can’t cool off.
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No one wants to work in a space that makes them feel uninspired, which is why one key part of staying motivated while working from home during the summer is having a nice, enticing setup.
Coffee lovers can rejoice this summer: The days of watered-down iced coffee at your desk are no more. This super cute glass has a daisy floral design, a bamboo lid, and a glass straw to keep your coffee cold and prevent spillage or melted ice.
Summer is the perfect opportunity to reset your career goals, start new habits, pick back up on any resolutions you made in January but haven’t stuck to, and find new ways to stay productive. This undated planner is perfect because even if you skip a week (starting new habits is hard, we know), you can pick back up anytime.
A desk fan, but make it sleek. This foldable and portable desk fan is battery-powered and comes with its own USB charging cable and remote control. Plus, it’s super quiet and comes in 3 colors.
Keep your skin cool, hydrated, and fresh this summer by keeping this facial spray nearby. Mist this onto your face or neck whenever you’re in need of a pick-me-up. Bonus: keeping this on your desk and using it throughout the day will protect your skin from blue light and environmental damage.
Move over Stanley, there’s a new internet-favorite water bottle in town. If you want to stay hydrated this summer, this insulated stainless steel tumbler from Owala is the only tool you need.
Summer footwear, while undeniably cute, doesn’t always offer the best support for feet. Get ahead of any foot pain or pain caused from sitting in a chair for prolonged periods of time with this ergonomic foot rest under your desk. Use simply for comfort and to relieve stress on your body or as a foot massager to relieve any pain.
Struggling to get things done at work when the only place you want to be is on your patio enjoying a refreshing cocktail? Warm weather calling your name as you stare at spreadsheets all day? Maximize your productivity this summer and hone in on your time management skills with the help of this cube Pomodoro timer.
There’s no getting around it: Summer is busy. Whether it’s your work life or your personal one, there’s a lot going on, and staying focused and stress-free can be a challenge. In those times, turn to Equilibria’s Daily Drops for a targeted dose of CBD to help keep you centered, calm, and productive. Primp tip: Putting a few drops in your morning coffee or water is an amazing way to include CBD in your work routine.
Get rid of dry, chapped lips this summer with this lip oil from Kosas. Plus, a quick swipe of this is all you need to look put together for your virtual meetings throughout the day.
Finding the time to go to the gym or get in a quick workout can be a challenge during the summer with everything else going on. Turn to this 2-in-1 folding treadmill for help. It’s light, portable, and can be used by itself or placed under your desk, so you can work on your fitness while making moves in your career.
Clingy, co-dependent, controlling? Not Shay Mitchell. We love Shay for a lot of reasons—her style, wellness routine, and travel bag brand BÉIS, to name a few—but it’s her recent advice for dealing with relationship anxiety that has made us fall in love with her even more than we ever thought was possible. In aninterview that Shay did with Alex Cooper on the Call Her Daddy podcast, she was asked how she can trust her longtime boyfriend and father of two kids, Matte Babel, traveling with Drake, going to parties, and being around other women while she is at home with their kids, and Shay’s honest and relatable response was so profound that the clip garnered 8.5 million views and counting on TikTok.
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Acting as a PSA to women everywhere, Shay Mitchell’s solution for dealing with relationship anxiety comes down to self-love, independence, and knowing your worth. We’re breaking down exactly how Shay implements this mindset into her own life and relationship and offering even more advice for how you can adopt it too.
What is relationship anxiety?
While it might sound self-explanatory, let’s first break down exactly what relationship anxiety is and where it stems from. According toHealthline, it refers to the feelings of worry, insecurity, and doubt that can pop up in a relationship, even if everything is going relatively well. You might wonder what your partner is doing when you’re not around, doubt their feelings for you, second guess their commitment to you and more. These feelings and thoughts usually stem from personal insecurities, past relationship experiences,attachment styles, or a lack of trust and communication.
The good news is that experiencing relationship anxiety is extremely common (even in the healthiest relationships); however, feelings of worry, insecurity, and doubt can start to make people spiral out of control, causing distress, sleepless nights, and ultimately affecting someone’s well-being as well as the well-being of their relationship. If you have ever experienced this or are experiencing it now, Shay’s advice is exactly what you need to hear.
Shay Mitchell’s advice for relationship anxiety
Let’s make one thing clear: Even though we consider Shay a total queen who can do no wrong, even she is not immune to experiencing relationship anxiety. She mentioned in the interview that she too has lost sleep worrying about her relationships in the past and that it can be hard even now because she does truly care. She goes on to say that if anything were to happen with her and her boyfriend, she would deal with it then, but for the sake of her happiness and the happiness of her partner, she says “I can’t live my life worrying about what he’s doing,” and to that, we say amen sister.
Shay adds that “when you truly love somebody, you want them to live their happiest life”—even if it’s not with you. You have to understand that you can’t control everyone around you—the only thing you can do is what’s best for you. So, if you are dealing with relationship anxiety, playing some variation of this Shay Mitchell quote in your head on repeat will help you tenfold: “If you can take him from me, then he’s yours.”
Why this advice can help relieve relationship anxiety
One of the main reasons why Shay can confidently navigate through her relationship without relationship anxiety is because she truly does believe that what’s meant to will be. She mentioned that when she used to worry about her past relationships, it got to the point where she would have to ask herself what would happen if something went wrong. She decided that her mindset would be “I’ll be OK, I’ll keep it moving,” adding that if that’s the case, it wasn’t meant to be.
If you have an anxious attachment style, this can be a hard lesson to learn, but once you accept that sleepless nights aren’t going to change anything, you’ll be less stressed, worried, and doubtful. “We’re going to do what we’re going to do,” according to Shay, so you can’t worry about something before it happens. She added that instead of spending time worrying about our partners, we should be spending time bettering ourselves. This will allow us to feel more confident in our independence, which will in turn help us feel more confident in ourselves and whatever the outcome of our relationship is.
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How to implement Shay Mitchell’s advice in your relationship
If you are feeling like you are in a constant state of anxiety, worrying about what your partner is doing, how they feel about you, and if your relationship is going to last, Shay says that “you need to be in love with yourself more.” She added that “you shouldn’t be feeling that way in a healthy relationship, and if you are, then maybe it isn’t the right one.”
Start by accepting that whatever is going to happen will happen whether it’s for better or for worse in your relationship. You can’t drain your happiness trying to control the outcome or lose track of the valuable time that you could be focusing on yourself or spending genuine quality time with friends and family. Move forward by putting trust in your partner and truly wanting what is best for yourself and them as individuals first. That will reveal whether or not you and your partner will be together for the long haul or if there is something better waiting for both of you on the other side.
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